Finally, a day that I can relax at home. Even though I have to drive to PA tomorrow again for another concert, yet a day is plenty to get my lost energy back. I woke up early so I can drop off my cousin, Yi-An, and her friend for their 4 days 3 nights East-America Tour.
With all the horrific driving experiences I have gone through for the past week, I thought I would copy paste part of this forwarded e-mail here. I think they are funny, however sadly true in most cases:
___________________________________________
*you must learn to call it by its rightful name. It is D.C., or
"the District." Only tourists call it Washington.
*There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in D.C. It's
just another chase, usually on the BW Parkway.
*All directions start with "The Beltway"...which has no beginning and
no end, just one continuous loop that locals believe is somehow clarified
by an 'inner' and 'outer loop' designation. This makes no sense to
ANYONE outside the Beltway.
*The morning rush hour is from 5 to 11 AM. The evening rush hour is
from 1 to 8 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning, especially
during the summer on Route 50 eastbound.
*Rain causes an immediate 50 point drop of IQ in drivers.
*Snow causes an immediate 100 point drop in IQ and a rush to the Giant
for toilet paper and milk.
*Don't forget that if your destination is only a mile away, it will
take at least 30 minutes to get there due to traffic congestion: the idiot in
the BMW SUV who thinks he has to conduct a conference call to negotiate
world peace while swerving all over the world, the scores of newcomers
who decide to cross the road when there's a mass of cars coming at them
going 80 mph, thus causing everyone to slam on their brakes which leads
to an accident, and the sadistic people who have to stare at the fender
bender.
*All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase, "Oh, we're in
Takoma Park."
*If someone actually has their turn signal on, they are, by definition,
a tourist.
*Car horns are actually "Road Rage" indicators. Heed the warning.
*All old ladies in Buicks have the right of way in the area of Leisure
World.
*Many roads mysteriously change their names as you cross intersections.
Don't ask why, no one knows.
*A taxi ride across town will cost you $12.50. A taxi ride two blocks
will cost you $16.75 (It's a zone thing, you wouldn't understand.)
*Traveling south out of DC on Interstate 395/295/95 is the most
dangerous, scariest thing you will ever do. There is nothing more
comforting than seven lanes of traffic cruising along at 85 mph, BUMPER
TO BUMPER!!!
*The minimum acceptable speed on the Beltway is 85. Anything less is
considered downright sissy.
*The open lane for passing on all Maryland interstates is the far right
lane because no self-respecting Marylander would ever be caught driving
in the "slow" lane. Unofficially, both shoulders are fair game also.
*The far left lanes on all Maryland interstates are official "chat"
lanes reserved for drivers who wish to talk on their cell phones. Note: All
mini-vans and SUVs have priority clearance to use the far left at
whatever speed the driver feels most comfortable multi-tasking in.
*If the humidity is 90+ and the temperature is 90+, then it's May,
June, July, August, September, and sometimes October.
*Always remember this little rule on the Metro: Stand right, walk
left. People WILL knock you down the Metro escalator and shout nasty things.
*A handy-dandy tip when bar-hopping: Unless you're on a first-name
basis with the President, Condy Rice, certain Senators or
Representatives, or Donald Rumsfield...you get the idea...no one cares
about you or your life story.
*DC'ers are busy, important people who only want to talk to
other busy, important people. We are not friendly folks looking to meet new
like minded people; we only want to know what you can do for us...
otherwise, get out of the way and stop boring us.
___________________________________________
With all the horrific driving experiences I have gone through for the past week, I thought I would copy paste part of this forwarded e-mail here. I think they are funny, however sadly true in most cases:
___________________________________________
*you must learn to call it by its rightful name. It is D.C., or
"the District." Only tourists call it Washington.
*There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in D.C. It's
just another chase, usually on the BW Parkway.
*All directions start with "The Beltway"...which has no beginning and
no end, just one continuous loop that locals believe is somehow clarified
by an 'inner' and 'outer loop' designation. This makes no sense to
ANYONE outside the Beltway.
*The morning rush hour is from 5 to 11 AM. The evening rush hour is
from 1 to 8 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning, especially
during the summer on Route 50 eastbound.
*Rain causes an immediate 50 point drop of IQ in drivers.
*Snow causes an immediate 100 point drop in IQ and a rush to the Giant
for toilet paper and milk.
*Don't forget that if your destination is only a mile away, it will
take at least 30 minutes to get there due to traffic congestion: the idiot in
the BMW SUV who thinks he has to conduct a conference call to negotiate
world peace while swerving all over the world, the scores of newcomers
who decide to cross the road when there's a mass of cars coming at them
going 80 mph, thus causing everyone to slam on their brakes which leads
to an accident, and the sadistic people who have to stare at the fender
bender.
*All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase, "Oh, we're in
Takoma Park."
*If someone actually has their turn signal on, they are, by definition,
a tourist.
*Car horns are actually "Road Rage" indicators. Heed the warning.
*All old ladies in Buicks have the right of way in the area of Leisure
World.
*Many roads mysteriously change their names as you cross intersections.
Don't ask why, no one knows.
*A taxi ride across town will cost you $12.50. A taxi ride two blocks
will cost you $16.75 (It's a zone thing, you wouldn't understand.)
*Traveling south out of DC on Interstate 395/295/95 is the most
dangerous, scariest thing you will ever do. There is nothing more
comforting than seven lanes of traffic cruising along at 85 mph, BUMPER
TO BUMPER!!!
*The minimum acceptable speed on the Beltway is 85. Anything less is
considered downright sissy.
*The open lane for passing on all Maryland interstates is the far right
lane because no self-respecting Marylander would ever be caught driving
in the "slow" lane. Unofficially, both shoulders are fair game also.
*The far left lanes on all Maryland interstates are official "chat"
lanes reserved for drivers who wish to talk on their cell phones. Note: All
mini-vans and SUVs have priority clearance to use the far left at
whatever speed the driver feels most comfortable multi-tasking in.
*If the humidity is 90+ and the temperature is 90+, then it's May,
June, July, August, September, and sometimes October.
*Always remember this little rule on the Metro: Stand right, walk
left. People WILL knock you down the Metro escalator and shout nasty things.
*A handy-dandy tip when bar-hopping: Unless you're on a first-name
basis with the President, Condy Rice, certain Senators or
Representatives, or Donald Rumsfield...you get the idea...no one cares
about you or your life story.
*DC'ers are busy, important people who only want to talk to
other busy, important people. We are not friendly folks looking to meet new
like minded people; we only want to know what you can do for us...
otherwise, get out of the way and stop boring us.
___________________________________________
Well, I am off to the kitchen. I think I will bake some muffins and a bannana cake, then I can start to prepare for the dinner. ^_^ Nice for a change!
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